HUMEROUS HAIKU # 1

 

I heard about the

Claustrophobic astronaut

Who wanted some space

STAR WARS CHEESE

 

What cheese do they serve

In the Star Wars cafeteria

Or in a galaxy far far away?

The answer is Boba Feta

SOME STAR WARS DROIDS

 

In Star Wars some droids are

Self-centered, like C-3PO

Everything is me, me, me,

He should be named C-mePO

STAR WARS MOVIES WERE MADE

 

Star Wars Movies were made

Out of sequence, because

At the beginning, in charge

Of film scheduling, Yoda was.

I PREFER THE MORE ROMANTIC VIEW

 

I prefer the more romantic view

Even if it’s not scientifically right

That the stars in the nocturnal sky

Are holes in the curtain of night

I’VE ALWAYS BEEN AN AVID READER # 2

 

I’ve always been an avid reader

I like books about distant Galaxies

I can’t put down the current one

It’s a great book about antigravity

GAMBLING WAS NOT CONDONED

 

Gambling was not condoned

And using the Force wasn’t done

However, the Jedi Knights

Had a bet regardless and Obi Wan

ON THEIR FIRST MISSION TOGETHER

 

On their first mission together

Aboard the Millennium Falcon

Chewbacca made a Wookiee mistake

When he killed Han

THE FLAT EARTH SOCIETY

 

The Flat Earth Society

Is the subject of a major probe

As it emerged that they

Have members around the globe

IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A SPACE PARTY

 

If you want to have a Space party

You should get NASA to “planet”

But even if they agree, their party,

Won’t have any atmosphere I bet

THERE IS A GREAT STAR WARS SPECIAL

 

There is a great Star Wars Special

At the salon, amid the lotions and lacquer

Where they are doing a wax treatment

Called the Chewbacca sacca and cracca

CHEWBACCA THE WOOKIEE

 

Chewbacca the Wookiee

Was the victim of an attack

Someone has given him

An all over body wax

THEY ARE HAVING TO REMAKE

 

They are having to remake

The Ewok movie

As they now identify

As Shewoks apparently

HAN SOLO AND CHEWBACCA

 

Han Solo and Chewbacca

Were not paid for a delivery

So, Han got straight to the point

“You owe me one Kenobi”

ON THE MILLENNIUM FALCON

On the Millennium Falcon

When things are a bit slow

With time to knock one out,

Which is called a hand solo 

CHEWBACCA IS DEAD

 

Chewbacca is dead

But he did not die in vain

HIs pelt made a great tent

To keep out the rain

STAR WARS TODAY

 

If the Star Wars series

Was only just written

Luke would be a vegan

Flying the Millennial Falcon

THE FIRST MAN TO PEE

 

The first man to pee

On the Moon

Was Buzz Aldrin

But in view of that

He should be called

Wizz Aldrin

WHAT'S E.T. SHORT FOR

Somebody once said to me

“What's E.T. short for?”

I said I really didn’t know,

Which was what he was hoping for,

“He's only got little legs” he said

Which I hadn’t thought of before 

The Tornado Sojourns (2) – Chapter 22 – The Strike

 

When they had landed on Linden the Commander addressed the five members of the Scorpions crew, who were all restrained.

“You will now be taken outside where you will wait under guard while your vessel is thoroughly searched”

“And when you find nothing I will have you lick my boots as an apology before I have you thrown out of your precious Legion Aeronautica” Maxil shouted

 

Prior to the arrival on a rocky plain on Linden of the Scorpion and its Legion escorts, Lyris landed the Spider Hawk on top of a cliff overlooking the plain from where Merri, Lyris, Malena, Shiyne and Parse watched the scene unfold below them through binoculars.  

They would have liked to have been there in person to witness the capture of the Ghambran’s, but they knew that as enjoyable as it might undoubtedly have been to witness at close hand the humbling of Maxil and Vint, it would not have been the wisest course of action because if it were known that they had been responsible for the Ghambran’s arrest and the subsequent shame inflicted on Prefector Collis and Ghambra as a whole, they would merely have disposed of one set of pursuers only to have them replaced by an infinite number of new ones, so they preserved their anonymity and watched from a safe distance via a lens, although they couldn’t get a clear look at the Ghambran’s from their vantage point as the Scorpion was between the watchers and the prisoners.

They did however record the images that they got, to show the rest of the crew when they returned to the Tornado.

 

They continued to watch as a procession of Legion personnel streamed inside the Scorpion while Commander Salmin paced up and down and after more than half an hour they were getting a little impatient.

“What on earth is taking so long?” Merri asked

“How well did you hide it Malena?”

“Not that well” Malena replied

“Perhaps we should just call the Commander and tell him were you hid it” Lyris said

“You could give him a long-range hint Shiyne” Merri suggested

“I can try” she replied, “But he’s a bit far away and he’s an intelligent man so it won’t be easy”

But she closed her eyes and tried to seek out the Commander with her mind but only moments later Merri interrupted her

“Somethings happening”

So, they all resumed their spying positions.

The Commander, who had never desisted in his pacing, had been brought to a halt by the presence of Lt Nulak who first saluted and then handed him the leather bundle.

The Commander looked at it and then asked the Lt a question, who nodded a response followed by another salute.

The commander was visibly relieved to have the prize in his hand and slapped his thigh when he thought no one was looking.

A few moments later Maxil Weltz and the other Ghambran’s appeared and were directed to where the Commander was standing.

They couldn’t hear what was said but they could get the gist.

The Commander was obviously confronting them with the evidence found aboard the Scorpion and his captives acted angrily to that evidence and it was clear that Weltz and Reganus were using some very uncomplimentary language and the former was raging and his eyes were bulging and his face changed colour.

“I think he must have a little Vann DNA in him” Lyris said “his complexion has definitely taken on a shade of cerise”

“Oh dear, he’s going to have a heart attack if he carries on” Merri added

“I think he’s safe, after all you need a heart first” Malena said

The five of them continued watching and were enjoying the view as the angry Ghambran’s were marched aboard the Legion Command ship.

 

After watching the Legion fleet and the Scorpion leave the surface of Linden Merri said

“Come on let’s go home”

And everyone knew what she meant because that was precisely what each and every one of them thought the Tornado was, home.

And when the Spider Hawk docked with the Tornado and they climbed down through the hatch the greeting they received from the rest of the crew was more one of relief than triumph.

But they all went to the mess room and shared one of Bagg’s excellent meals in what felt to them all like a family occasion rather than a celebration.

They saved the celebration meal for when they returned to Montrose although they did have a drink or two with Oshwin Lemik on Soman.

 

They should have felt guilty after effectively framing the Ghambran’s for a crime they knew full well they didn’t commit but they didn’t.

They may indeed have been innocent of the criminal, subversive and treasonable acts that landed them in court but they were not innocent, they had committed many and varied crimes and had always gotten away with them because they were under the banner of Prefector Collis’s protection.

But the charges that they faced, they had to face alone because Maxil Weltz and Vint Reganus were disowned by Prefector Collis, who chose to distance himself from his former employees fearing he might otherwise find himself in the dock for treason.

Because of the sensitive nature of the crime the trials were held “in camera” so no one on Gouveia knew how close the house of Alegionaris came to disaster.

 

In reward for finding the Crown Jewels Commander Salmin was made Supreme Commander for the whole of the Eikon Cluster and those aboard the Tornado, and their friends and allies felt the weight of his gratitude.

So as a result of their action to preserve the life they loved in the Cluster they actually enhanced it greatly.

And apart from no longer being pursued by hostiles, and with perpetually full cargo pods, the full complement aboard also enjoyed an abundance of love, Merri had her hunky Legionnaire Parse by her side, her best friends, Malena and Shiyne had their lovers, Zerrad and Terrell with them, Zerrad’s brother Lyris had been tamed by the member of the Gouveian Royal family among their number, Asti.

While engineers Pulsat and Vanzyl, who were magicians with all things mechanical had also found love, a love for the children of Montrose, who loved them in equal measure.

Even Visitor Parham, who tended their spiritual needs while his alter ego Bagg fortified them with his culinary prowess, had also found love in the form of his family on Montrose.

So, everything for the Tempest Class Freighter Tornado was set fare, and Captain Merionwen Strong knew that apart from a good crew, good food and a liberal quantity of love that on the Tornado’s Sojourns around the Eikon Cluster they were bound to have more adventure.